Confessions of a Bossy Woman

by Jennifer Miller on April 15, 2013

in Communication, Personal Effectiveness

Even the most assured person needs an occasional boost

Even the most assured person needs an occasional boost

Back in my college days, one of the requirements for my psychology degree was to complete a one-semester practicum out in the “real world”. I chose to work with three- and four-year olds in a daycare center.

After about a month at the center, I had proven that I could work with the kids independently for short periods of time. One day, as I was busy leading a group activity, the daycare director, John, walked in to observe. After we finished up, John walked over to me and said, “You know what? You’re bossy.”

Me, bossy? And with small children, no less? What kind of monster was I? John must have seen the stricken look on my face because he cracked a smile and said, “I like that in a person. You need to take charge of these kids. Bossiness isn’t always a bad thing.”

Indeed. I’m the eldest child in my family so I got lots of practice bossing around my two brothers when we were growing up. It started early and clearly, was still evident during my early twenties.

Over the years, I’ve learned to shape my bossiness into something more useful, like assuredness. From a professional standpoint, people tell me that  because of my confident demeanor, they enjoy working with me.

I am a confident person. Except when I’m not.

Confession time: even self-assured people have the occasional crisis of confidence. For example, over the past year, I’ve been slowly retooling my consulting practice and changing up my service offerings. Along the way, there have been doubts – Am I going in the right direction? Will people want these new services.

These doubts started to creep into my language and telegraph themselves to the world. Conversations at business and networking functions that were normally very easy for me had started to become stilted and self-conscious. Thankfully, an opportunity to get out of my communication tailspin came along in the form of a program called Self-Promotion Strategies for Women, led by Dana Theus founder of InPower Coaching and editor of the site InPower Women.

This program opened my eyes. Through the group coaching calls I learned that I wasn’t alone. . . that other accomplished professional women sometimes struggle with self-doubt. Most importantly, I came away with information on how to change my thinking and my language, so that I could communicate my value to the outside world.

I learned to communicate with confidence about the new direction of my professional life.

Which is kind of ironic considering my bossy pants history.

Are you a woman who is confident, except when she’s not? Do you have a desire to build credibility and get ahead in your career? And to do so in a way that allows you to be taken seriously without being labeled as “bossy” (or the other “b” word?)

If this notion speaks to you, I urge to you check out a free webinar called Communicating with Confidence that Dana is offering on Friday, April 26th, 2013. This webinar will highlight many of the same powerful communication concepts from the Self-Promotion program that I attended.

Click here to learn more about the Communicating with Confidence free webinar.

One last note – I learned so much from Dana’s program last fall that I felt compelled to help get the message of communicating confidently out to more women. So, Dana has invited me to study with her to become an InPower Affiliate Coach. I’ll be leading the group coaching calls for the full-scale Communicate with Confidence program, which starts in May, 2013. This is a perfect blend of my former life as a corporate trainer and my new business focus as a Career Strategist and Leadership Coach.

Please join us!

Image credit: flybird163 / 123RF Stock Photo

Disclosure: attendance at the Communicating with Confidence webinar on April 26, 2013 is free and there is no obligation to purchase anything. Dana packs a lot of great information into the free webinar. Know that I only endorse programs that I personally find useful. There will be an opportunity to enroll in the full, six-week Communicate with Confidence program. If you do so, I will be compensated for my time.

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